Bar and Bat Miztvahs

At BHCBE we are committed to making your child’s bar/bat mitzvah a most meaningful and joyous event in the life of your family. It takes a congregation to make a bar/bat mitzvah, and we as a congregation will do our utmost to help you celebrate this important day in your child’s life.

A child’s bar/bat mitzvah is a milestone in their Jewish education. At BHCBE, we require five years of Jewish education prior to bar/bat mitzvah, either in our Academy, the Solomon Schechter Day School, or an equivalent program. In our school, students will learn Hebrew language, prayers and the blessings and cantillations for Torah and haftarah chanting.

The first step in preparing for the bar/bat mitzvah ceremony is the selection of a date. In determining the date of a bar/bat mitzvah, we first check your child’s Hebrew birthday. A boy may celebrate his bar mitzvah when he is 13 and a day on the Hebrew calendar; a girl may celebrate her bat mitzvah at age 12 and a day (though many wait until age 13). We generally select the b’nai mitzvah dates at the end of fourth grade in our Religious School. Dates will be chosen in consultation with the parents. All dates are confirmed by the rabbi of the congregation.

There are several options for bar/bat mitzvah at BHCBE. The most popular is the Shabbat morning bar/bat mitzvah where your child will read a haftarah portion and selections from the Torah, and will deliver a short speech on the Torah portion (D’var Torah). Family members will be honored with aliyot and may lead parts of the service. The ceremony will be the centerpiece of the morning’s service, and will be followed by a congregational Kiddush, which is sponsored by the bar/bat mitzvah family. Our catering director will work with you to help you plan a Kiddush that meets your family’s needs.

Some of our families choose a Mincha/Ma'ariv/Havdalah bar/bat mitzvah for their child. At the Minha bar/bat mitzvah there would be a short Torah reading plus a D’var Torah, and your child would take part in leading the service. When a bar/bat mitzvah is celebrated with a Mincha service, we require that the party following take place at BHCBE. We celebrate b’nai mitzvahs at Mincha during the fall and winter months, when Shabbat ends early on Saturday evenings. On occasion we will recommend a Mincha bar/bat mitzvah for students for whom the shorter service and readings are desirable.

Other options for a family might include bar/bat mitzvah on a Rosh Hodesh (New Month) that might fall on a Sunday, or the Monday of a legal holiday weekend, as the Torah is read on Monday mornings. A bar/bat mitzvah on a legal holiday might incur additional expenses.

Our synagogue is available to you for additional celebrations during the weekend of your child’s bar/bat mitzvah. Our large facility can house a Saturday evening or Sunday party, a children’s party, and a Friday evening dinner. Our catering coordinator will assist you in the selection of a suitable caterer, and in arranging the logistics of the event. Bar/bat mitzvah celebrations come in all sizes and shapes at BHCBE - the diversity of ways we celebrate our children’s b’nai mitzvahs is one of the hallmarks of the congregation.

Click here to see the 3-year B'nai Mitzvah timeline